Clipped speech!
current mood: bitchy
You know the scene. You're rushing through the town, trying to do all the things that need to be done by a certain time and some cheery oick collars you with their clipboard clamped firmly in one hand and a well inked biro in the other! I usually keep rushing and throw: Sorry, I'm late for the bus!" over my shoulder as I speed by. However, some step out in front of you when you least expect it and if they start with the stock phrase of: "Excuse me *madam. Can I ask you a couple of questions?", don't panic. No need to batter them over the head with your shopping in an attempt to get away as there is a simple solution. Smile sweetly and say: "Of course you can."
Immediately, they relax, return your smile and ask a question. You smile and give your reply. By now they are beaming and well into their stride so they come at you with the next query. (I hope you're counting as this question will be number three)!
This is when you say: "I'm sorry but I've answered a couple (i.e. two) questions as requested. Goodbye!" and depart before the look of astonishment has had time to leave their face. If they shout: "Smarta**e!" at your back as you make your way down the street this gives their 'nice, kind person with a clipboard' image a severe battering and they have to work extra hard at getting another poor fool to fill in their form. Yay!
*'Madam' - (sighs and then begins to snuffle) - I think I'd fill the b****y form in myself if one of them (especially the young handsome males) could bring themselves to call me 'Miss' instead! :D





